The Best Weird Christmas Movies That Defy All Logic

It’s the most wonderful time of the year … for movies! Every year we are gifted with the season’s holiday movies, which tend to follow a standard formula: Two people who are unlikely to find love in a small town do just that. There are a few, mostly inconsequential conflicts along the way, and everything works out in the end when the snow starts falling and our destined-for-each-other couple shares a kiss.

I love the escapism of these movies as much as you. But this year I came across something even more fascinating — the weird holiday movie. So if you’ve had enough of small-town romance, and want to surprise and delight your family and friends at your holiday gathering, turn on one of these crazy Christmas movies and prepare to be entertained, and confused. 

“Grumpy Cat’s Worst Christmas Ever”

Is there anything better than a meme becoming a movie? Watch the late celebrity cat Tardar Sauce (aka Grumpy Cat) feel grumpy about everything for 90 minutes. Grumpy is living in a mall pet shop that is destined to close when she discovers that she can communicate with a lonely 12-year-old girl, Chrystal. Grumpy is adopted by Chrystal and the two must work together to stop a fancy dog (who Grumpy does not like, big surprise) from being kidnapped. Grumpy Cat is cute and Aubrey Plaza is funny as her voiceover, so as far as meme movies go, this isn’t the worst.
Stream on Prime, rated G

“The Nuttiest Nutcracker”

Simply put, this is the story of the Nutcracker told from the point of view of a bowl of talking nuts, fruit and vegetables. It gives strong Veggie Tales vibes. There are plenty of random, mediocre songs, all the nut puns you can handle, and some weird additions to the Nutcracker story including a cheese mine and flying cheese mobiles.

The computer animation from 1999 looks quite dated to our 21st century eyes. But, at only 48 minutes, it will provide young viewers with some offbeat holiday entertainment.
Stream on Amazon Prime Video, rated G

“Santa With Muscles”

This holiday comedy, starring professional wrestler Hulk Hogan, burst onto screens in 1996. The story follows a wealthy businessman named Blake Thorn (an A+ name for sure), who suffers from amnesia after an accident. Believing he is Santa Claus, he inadvertently becomes a hero when he helps a group of children at a local orphanage. As “Santa,” he takes on a new sense of purpose and discovers the true meaning of Christmas, naturally. Get ready for cheesy dialogue, silly physical comedy, and of course, a sleeveless Santa suit.
Stream on Tubi, rated PG

“My Santa”

Did you know Santa Claus has a son? Neither did I! Apparently, he does and he works as a mall Santa. But Kris Kringle Jr. has a very specific goal for the holiday season — he needs to find a wife who can become the next Mrs. Claus so they can pass the Christmas spirit to the next generation. While this is a weird storyline for sure, this movie also offers plenty of your standard Christmas movie tropes: A struggling single mom hates Christmas but must learn to rediscover the magic of the season by the stroke of midnight on Christmas to marry the perfect man, who also happens to be magical.
Stream on Amazon Prime Video, rated PG

“Hot Frosty”

This movie checks many boxes for your typical holiday movie: stressed-out woman having a hard time during the holidays — check; a small town where everyone knows each other — check; a stranger showing up who falls in love with the stressed-out woman — check.

But the stranger is where things get weird: He’s a snowman that has come to life. But not any snowman — a chiseled hottie who was carved as part of a snow sculpture contest and brought to life by a magical love scarf that the movie’s heroine (Kathy) wraps around his neck. Hot Frosty (known as Jack) is played by Dustin Milligan, who has apparently been doing nothing but work out since “Schitt’s Creek” (he played the sweet veterinarian, Ted) ended a few years ago. Kathy is played by Lacey Chabert, best known to many as Gretchen from “Mean Girls” (the movie does a great job acknowledging this, it actually made me laugh out loud). This movie (like many holiday films) is rather pointless, but if you’ve got an hour and a half to kill and you want to feel festive, this will do. It’s totally fetch.
Stream on Netflix, rated PG

“Santa Claus vs. The Devil” 

This strange movie from 1959 starts in Santa’s international toy factory with kids from around the world singing and making toys. (Depicted with some pretty outdated racial stereotypes. Honestly, you can skip this whole part and not miss a thing.) And apparently the workshop is in outer space? Or maybe heaven? It’s unclear. As he prepares to head to Earth on Christmas Eve, Santa enlists an interesting group of helpers, including Merlin the Wizard, who makes a special stardust sleeping powder and gives Santa a magic flower that makes him disappear. Santa also visits his shirtless blacksmith who makes a giant golden key that opens all doors on Earth. Handy!

The devil spends all his time running around giving people bad ideas and causing chaos. While on Earth, Santa gets chased by a dog and stuck in a tree. Will he escape before being seen by the whole town?
Stream on YouTube, rated PG

“Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny” 

I don’t have words to explain how truly weird this movie is, so I’ll just give you some of the highlights: Santa somehow gets his sleigh stuck in the sand in Florida and sings a song calling all the children to him, including Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn (why not). They all sing a song about wanting to help Santa and then bring a parade of farm animals and one gorilla (of course) to try and pull him out of the sand. When nothing works, Santa tells them the story of Jack and the Beanstalk to remind them to have faith and never give up, and we are gifted with a little movie-within-the-movie (well, musical really). Finally, all the children come back in an antique fire truck driven by the Ice Cream Bunny (whose costume is pure nightmare fuel) who saves Santa. Does any of this make sense? No. Does it feel like watching a drug-induced fever dream from the 1970s? Yes. Merry Christmas.
Stream on Amazon Prime Video, rated PG

“Santa Claus Conquers The Martians” 

In this 1964 gem, the children of Mars are joyless and spend all their time learning (by connecting wires to their antennas) and being serious. There is no laughter, and they have become so depressed they won’t even take their food pills! The Martian adults decide that Santa must come to Mars and bring them Christmas which will make all the children happy again. Sure, why not.

They fly to Earth to bring Santa back to Mars and end up also kidnapping a brother and sister, creatively named Billy and Betty. Santa seems pretty good-natured about the whole thing and does indeed start making toys for Martian children, but is worried Ms. Claus will be mad if he doesn’t get back to Earth in time for Christmas. Will they ever make it back to Earth? You’ll have to watch and find out. If you are looking for laughs, you are in luck! Mystery Science Theater 3000 has an episode featuring this movie.
Stream on Amazon Prime Video, rated PG

“Krampus”

When Max, frustrated by his family’s fighting, renounces his belief in the Christmas season, he accidentally summons Krampus, the evil counterpart to Santa Claus. A snowstorm traps the unhappy family in their home, and Krampus and his terrifying minions begin to punish them for their lack of holiday spirit. The movie blends dark humor, horror and festive elements, offering a twisted take on the traditional holiday story. And it’s pretty scary (I mean, it does star Toni Collette who is so good at being scary!), best for brave tweens and older.
Stream on Amazon Prime Video, rated PG-13

“Violent Night”

This movie is sort of like “Home Alone” on steroids (and references the Christmas classic many times), and I gotta admit, I liked it. David Harbour (who you might recognize as the sweet-yet-gruff cop, Hopper, from “Stranger Things”) makes a great, disgruntled, slightly intoxicated Santa Claus. Santa finds himself in the middle of a Christmas heist and, thanks to the belief and friendship of a little girl who needs him, he decides to save the family. Harbour’s Santa uses Christmas tree decorations, stockings and garlands in — shall we say — creative ways to end multiple bad guys. Santa doesn’t shoot any guns, but he knows his way around a sledgehammer (especially a special one known as Skullcrusher).

This movie is definitely violent and has plenty of F-bombs (hence the R rating) and is best for teens and older. But it also has lots of laughs and, weirdly, plenty of Christmas magic. I watched it with my 16-year-old son, and he really liked it. (Meaning he looked at the TV more than his phone and smiled several times. A ringing endorsement from a teen if ever there was one!)
Stream on Amazon Prime Video, rated R