8 Ways to Encourage Thankfulness

As Thanksgiving approaches, it’s natural to be thinking about gratitude and how to encourage it in our kids. According to Harvard Health, being grateful is associated with greater overall happiness, and can help people deal with adversity and even help form strong relationships. These are qualities we want for our children all year long!

How do we cultivate a sense of gratitude in our children? In her book “Raising Happiness,” Christine Carter writes, “Gratitude is a learned skill to be practiced, like kicking a soccer ball or speaking French.” What follows are eight ways you can help to build that skill in your child.

Be a good role model.

Model “please” and “thank you” just the way you’d want to see it in your children. Children are keen observers of how you treat others in your life, and they will naturally follow your lead. When eating out, for example, your server may or may not notice whether you thank them as they present your meal, but your children definitely will. The importance of being a good role model cannot be overstated and may be one of the most important ways to encourage gratitude, so keep your thank-yous at the ready!

Volunteer.

Volunteering can contribute to well-being in many ways, including increasing self-confidence, providing a sense of purpose and even improving physical health. There is also evidence to suggest that volunteering increases both gratitude and happiness. But there are even more benefits to volunteering. Depending on the activity, kids are given the opportunity to learn essential skills and increase their sense of responsibility.

Do chores.

Believe it or not, doing chores can increase gratitude. By participating in housework, children get a firsthand look at what it takes to run a household. This can raise their awareness of what is being done for them on a day-to-day basis and can awaken a sense of gratitude.

Count your blessings.

Whether it’s each night at dinner or as a bedtime routine, have children recount the best parts of their day. This account can be a reminder that even a bad day has good points and help end the day on a positive note.

Let kids earn some of their possessions.

Children can learn not only gratitude from earning some of their own possessions, but also a sense of responsibility. When they have worked for a toy or other item, they have a better sense of its value, potentially increasing their gratitude not just for that item, but for their other possessions as well.

Encourage thank-you notes.

Actual thank-you notes seem to be going out of style as our forms of communication become almost exclusively electronic. However, there is still something quite meaningful about writing and receiving a thank-you the old-fashioned way. If your child resists, try making sure that he or she writes a thank-you note before using a gift. This will encourage even the most reluctant child to complete the notes.

Extending ‘thank you.’

According to the Raising Grateful Children Project at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, 85 percent of parents prompt their children to say “thank you.” But going beyond common manners can help increase gratitude. Try asking children how a gift makes them feel, or why they think they received the gift.

Look on the bright side.

Try looking for the positive when things get hard. Asking yourself or your child what good could come out of a hard thing is a way to see the best in situations and can help increase gratitude. Next time things aren’t going as expected, try to point out the bright side to your children. It might lift your own mood, too!

All of these skills can build gratitude in your child, which can lead to a happier overall child as well as a more resilient one. These are great skills to build not just at Thanksgiving, but all year around.